Thursday, September 23, 2010
FYI: How I Score Video Games
As a video game reviewer, I do have an admittedly strange way of scoring the games I have reviewed. For instance, I take one rather unusual thing into account -- the purchase price of said game when I bought it, not its actual release price. So if I pay 10 bucks for "Rogue Warrior," an admittedly so-bad-it's-almost-good game, I'm much more likely to enjoy it than I would have had I paid full retail, thus allowing me to give it a score of 5 out of 10, which it otherwise wouldn't warrant. The same goes for games like "Bioshock 2" that I forked over sixty bones for -- I rate it according to my degree of personal disappointment vs. cost. It doesn't mean, if I give it a 6 out of 10, that I think it's just one number higher than "Rogue Warrior," for example. Hopefully this should shed some light on how my stupid brain works...
"Singularity" Review (PS3)
Russian mutants are a current and "totally in right now" fashion statement in video games. If you don't believe it, look at the "S.T.A.L.K.E.R." series, the awesome "Metro 2033," the upcoming budget title "MorphX," and, of course, "Singularity." Strangely, both "Singularity" and "Metro 2033" are my current favorites in 2010 -- although there's a lot out there that I've yet to play, I strongly suspect they will remain very near the top of that list. Sadly, both FPS games seem to have fallen by the wayside in the wake of powerhouse releases in the "Halo," "Modern Warfare," "Bioshock," and "Battlefield: Bad Company" franchises. This is probably to be expected of any new I.P., and it's too damn bad, because these are some damn fine games that I'll remember for a very long time.
In "Singularity," forged by a little known company called Raven Software (sarcasm), you are an elite U.S. soldier named Nate Renko who, like most FPS leads never speaks even when being directly spoken to, making him seem either deaf, moronic, pricky, or all of the above. "Hey, buddy, I just asked you a question!" Still, he's got a slight problem because his chopper just crashed on Katorga-12, a former Soviet facility during the Cold War that pulled a "Wolfenstein" with the Reds taking over for the Nazis by dabbling in some seriously forbidden science. This resulted in a "Half-Life" Black Mesa-sized "Oops!," unleashing hideous mutant freaks with a taste for flesh and all kinds of time and space craziness -- that, naturally, you'll get to dabble in yourself.
Well, I don't know what it is about Russian mutants, but they're starting to look a whole lot scarier than the rest of the world's mutants, because even the first of them that you'll face in "Singularity" might have you tinkling in your pants just a wee bit (no pun intended). Some scripted moments, in particular, made the first "F.E.A.R." look like amateur hour in terms of startling the shit out of me -- and many of these were in the first twenty minutes of gameplay. In fact, the earliest creatures you'll face are perhaps the scariest in the entire game, if not the most challenging. But one thing is certain -- there are some memorable baddies in "Singularity." Not "Metro 2033" memorable, but memorable all the same. (One blind creature with exceptional hearing is worth mentioning.) And "Singularity" has something "Metro" certainly does not -- this is an old school shooter and a damn good one. Despite a few jolts, it's not a survival horror game, but a straightforward actioner where even battling non-mutated foes is good, gory fun. In fact, it's gernerally preferable, which one might say makes it the polar opposite of the aforementioned title.
Your arsenal of weaponry is one of the best in recent years, delivering the down and dirty goods. The FPS action just feels right. The guns bark in mostly the right ways, and enemies react with gushing blood and sometimes severed limbs. One prototype weapon even allows you to follow your bullets into their targets as they explode into satisfying dismembered chunks. Raven proves yet again it can deliver in the action department here, and this is only aided by your ability to upgrade your weapons and make them steadily more potent, much like in 2009's "Wolfenstein" (no coincidence since Raven also developed that gem as well).
Also like that "Wolfenstein" redux, your ability to cause destruction is not limited to your firearms. As the game progresses, you will be able to manipulate time in ways that may age your human enemies to the point where you literally watch them turn to dust before your very eyes, or slow down time to give you a leg up on the competition. When it comes to the game's environmental puzzles, these abilities (also upgradable, btw) can sometimes come across as gimmicky, but there are clever moments too. One just wishes that the game allowed you to think outside the box a little. You are too limited to what the game wants you to do, meaning to progress you might not be able to turn that locked metal door in front of you into a rusted pile of debris, but that other one to your left that the game has designated sure as hell can be.
So, yes, the game is very, very linear. But this gives it a brisk, action-packed pace that scarcely ever relents, unlike its cousin "Wolfenstein." It also packs in some challenge, even on its easier settings. Its environments look suitably desolate and bleak in the present, but reflect an entirely different atmosphere in the past (which you visit frequently). The graphics, overall, are quite good, the frame rate is liquid smooth, and the soundtrack befitting the tone of the material. Complete with a decent storyline and several endings -- one which resulted in some delicious moral ambiguity -- this results in a great single player package. (Multiplayer is said to be good too, but I wouldn't know.)
In closing, "Singularity" is another awesome notch in Raven Software's belt that goes all the way back to its "Doom" engine antics with "Heretic." Russian mutants sure are fun to kill, and I recommend any FPS fan who has had his fill of "Halo" and "Modern Warfare" to give this new I.P. a look see. You won't regret it.
Final Score: 8.8 (Exceptional)
In "Singularity," forged by a little known company called Raven Software (sarcasm), you are an elite U.S. soldier named Nate Renko who, like most FPS leads never speaks even when being directly spoken to, making him seem either deaf, moronic, pricky, or all of the above. "Hey, buddy, I just asked you a question!" Still, he's got a slight problem because his chopper just crashed on Katorga-12, a former Soviet facility during the Cold War that pulled a "Wolfenstein" with the Reds taking over for the Nazis by dabbling in some seriously forbidden science. This resulted in a "Half-Life" Black Mesa-sized "Oops!," unleashing hideous mutant freaks with a taste for flesh and all kinds of time and space craziness -- that, naturally, you'll get to dabble in yourself.
Well, I don't know what it is about Russian mutants, but they're starting to look a whole lot scarier than the rest of the world's mutants, because even the first of them that you'll face in "Singularity" might have you tinkling in your pants just a wee bit (no pun intended). Some scripted moments, in particular, made the first "F.E.A.R." look like amateur hour in terms of startling the shit out of me -- and many of these were in the first twenty minutes of gameplay. In fact, the earliest creatures you'll face are perhaps the scariest in the entire game, if not the most challenging. But one thing is certain -- there are some memorable baddies in "Singularity." Not "Metro 2033" memorable, but memorable all the same. (One blind creature with exceptional hearing is worth mentioning.) And "Singularity" has something "Metro" certainly does not -- this is an old school shooter and a damn good one. Despite a few jolts, it's not a survival horror game, but a straightforward actioner where even battling non-mutated foes is good, gory fun. In fact, it's gernerally preferable, which one might say makes it the polar opposite of the aforementioned title.
Your arsenal of weaponry is one of the best in recent years, delivering the down and dirty goods. The FPS action just feels right. The guns bark in mostly the right ways, and enemies react with gushing blood and sometimes severed limbs. One prototype weapon even allows you to follow your bullets into their targets as they explode into satisfying dismembered chunks. Raven proves yet again it can deliver in the action department here, and this is only aided by your ability to upgrade your weapons and make them steadily more potent, much like in 2009's "Wolfenstein" (no coincidence since Raven also developed that gem as well).
Also like that "Wolfenstein" redux, your ability to cause destruction is not limited to your firearms. As the game progresses, you will be able to manipulate time in ways that may age your human enemies to the point where you literally watch them turn to dust before your very eyes, or slow down time to give you a leg up on the competition. When it comes to the game's environmental puzzles, these abilities (also upgradable, btw) can sometimes come across as gimmicky, but there are clever moments too. One just wishes that the game allowed you to think outside the box a little. You are too limited to what the game wants you to do, meaning to progress you might not be able to turn that locked metal door in front of you into a rusted pile of debris, but that other one to your left that the game has designated sure as hell can be.
So, yes, the game is very, very linear. But this gives it a brisk, action-packed pace that scarcely ever relents, unlike its cousin "Wolfenstein." It also packs in some challenge, even on its easier settings. Its environments look suitably desolate and bleak in the present, but reflect an entirely different atmosphere in the past (which you visit frequently). The graphics, overall, are quite good, the frame rate is liquid smooth, and the soundtrack befitting the tone of the material. Complete with a decent storyline and several endings -- one which resulted in some delicious moral ambiguity -- this results in a great single player package. (Multiplayer is said to be good too, but I wouldn't know.)
In closing, "Singularity" is another awesome notch in Raven Software's belt that goes all the way back to its "Doom" engine antics with "Heretic." Russian mutants sure are fun to kill, and I recommend any FPS fan who has had his fill of "Halo" and "Modern Warfare" to give this new I.P. a look see. You won't regret it.
Final Score: 8.8 (Exceptional)
"Prince of Persia" 2008 Review (PS3)
I loved the last-gen trilogy of "Prince of Persia" games, and have quite fond memories of the original game as well. But the annoyingly titled just "Prince of Persia" (somebody couldn't think of a damn subtitle or what?!) circa 2008 should take its place beside 1999's "Prince of Persia 3D" as one of the series' biggest disappointments. It seems that both Hollywood and the game's publisher are now in agreement, as the 2010 movie version is based on "The Sands of Time," more or less, and gaming turned its back on 2008's Prince and went crawling back to the one who came before him in the aforementioned trilogy, begging for "just one more chance" like a regretful ex-flame until he finally relented and okayed a fourth.
Again I differ from the gaming press in my opinion, but normally I differ in the other direction, as is the case most popularly (according to Youtube hits) with games like the original "Kane & Lynch" or "Dark Messiah of Might & Magic." Not because I'm a contrarian just to be a contrarian -- generally speaking video game reviewers and myself aren't divided by that huge of a gulf of opinion. But I expected more from a "Prince of Persia" game. This one just felt like the devs went off the deep end. My single greatest complaint with "Bioshock 2" was that it felt too much like a watered down "Bioshock" one. 2008's "PoP" went the other way by changing far too much and completely alienating me as a longtime fan.
But let's talk turkey. In "PoP," neither a remake or a sequel, you play as a new, claw-handed Prince who really, really wants to come off like a likable rogue but instead just lacks in personality. His quest allies him with Elika, who also plays a major role in the gameplay itself, as the two seek to imprison an evil god released into the world and bent on its destruction... You know the drill, which is fine. But don't expect anything as good as what the now-dubbed "Sands of Time Trilogy" offered in terms of story. This one may be more charming than "The Warrior Within," the first trilogy's only slight stumble with its lack of a tonally incoherent Godsmack tune, but that's not high praise.
But none of this is the problem. The problem is that the game literally almost feels like it doesn't need a gamer to actually play it. It goes beyond easy -- a lot of the time it feels like it plays itself! This would be a slight problem if this were a brand new I.P. called "Arabian Nights" or some such, but it wouldn't be unenjoyable per se as it sometimes recalls the "Sonic the Hedgehog" days of olde. But as a "PoP" game, it just doesn't feel right. The original game was known for its devious difficulty, while the "Sands of Time Trilogy" required your reflexes to be at their keenest, and were it not for a certain dagger that rewinds time, it too would have been merciless on the player. Not so with 2008's entry. Without said dagger, it's up to Elika to drop in for a convenient save if you miss your step and fall toward your demise -- which she does, as often as you like, the only penalty being you have to start a pre-ordained point a few seconds away at worst from where you made your last mistake. In essence, you'll never die. Ever.
The emphasis is, as always, on platforming and parkour-like moves that will take you from Point A to Point B. That was true of all the games in the series, but here combat plays an even smaller role than ever before -- and thank the gaming gods for that. Squaring off with opponents in this game is boring and sometimes frustrating. It almost feels like a mini-game where you pound buttons and hope to break through your enemy's defenses, but not a very good one. Even though the rest of the game is too forgiving and sometimes feels like it's running on rails, these action moments, moments which should provide a nice change of pace, are tedious and annoying.
The graphics and the level desgins, at least, all show off some quality. And it really isn't a bad game. The problem is that the designers thought they should fix something that was never actually broken to begin with. It quite simply doesn't feel like a "Prince of Persia" game, hence my disappointment. Others may feel differently if they are joining the series for the first time, but the game's overall lack of challenge should suit the casual gamer best.
Final Score: 6.9 (Fair)
Again I differ from the gaming press in my opinion, but normally I differ in the other direction, as is the case most popularly (according to Youtube hits) with games like the original "Kane & Lynch" or "Dark Messiah of Might & Magic." Not because I'm a contrarian just to be a contrarian -- generally speaking video game reviewers and myself aren't divided by that huge of a gulf of opinion. But I expected more from a "Prince of Persia" game. This one just felt like the devs went off the deep end. My single greatest complaint with "Bioshock 2" was that it felt too much like a watered down "Bioshock" one. 2008's "PoP" went the other way by changing far too much and completely alienating me as a longtime fan.
But let's talk turkey. In "PoP," neither a remake or a sequel, you play as a new, claw-handed Prince who really, really wants to come off like a likable rogue but instead just lacks in personality. His quest allies him with Elika, who also plays a major role in the gameplay itself, as the two seek to imprison an evil god released into the world and bent on its destruction... You know the drill, which is fine. But don't expect anything as good as what the now-dubbed "Sands of Time Trilogy" offered in terms of story. This one may be more charming than "The Warrior Within," the first trilogy's only slight stumble with its lack of a tonally incoherent Godsmack tune, but that's not high praise.
But none of this is the problem. The problem is that the game literally almost feels like it doesn't need a gamer to actually play it. It goes beyond easy -- a lot of the time it feels like it plays itself! This would be a slight problem if this were a brand new I.P. called "Arabian Nights" or some such, but it wouldn't be unenjoyable per se as it sometimes recalls the "Sonic the Hedgehog" days of olde. But as a "PoP" game, it just doesn't feel right. The original game was known for its devious difficulty, while the "Sands of Time Trilogy" required your reflexes to be at their keenest, and were it not for a certain dagger that rewinds time, it too would have been merciless on the player. Not so with 2008's entry. Without said dagger, it's up to Elika to drop in for a convenient save if you miss your step and fall toward your demise -- which she does, as often as you like, the only penalty being you have to start a pre-ordained point a few seconds away at worst from where you made your last mistake. In essence, you'll never die. Ever.
The emphasis is, as always, on platforming and parkour-like moves that will take you from Point A to Point B. That was true of all the games in the series, but here combat plays an even smaller role than ever before -- and thank the gaming gods for that. Squaring off with opponents in this game is boring and sometimes frustrating. It almost feels like a mini-game where you pound buttons and hope to break through your enemy's defenses, but not a very good one. Even though the rest of the game is too forgiving and sometimes feels like it's running on rails, these action moments, moments which should provide a nice change of pace, are tedious and annoying.
The graphics and the level desgins, at least, all show off some quality. And it really isn't a bad game. The problem is that the designers thought they should fix something that was never actually broken to begin with. It quite simply doesn't feel like a "Prince of Persia" game, hence my disappointment. Others may feel differently if they are joining the series for the first time, but the game's overall lack of challenge should suit the casual gamer best.
Final Score: 6.9 (Fair)
"Bioshock 2" Review (Xbox 360)
Dinner last night may have been great, but it's not so great when you heat up the leftovers for supper the next evening. Maybe it's soggy now. Or lukewarm. It just doesn't taste the same, despite consisting of all the same ingredients. Which brings me to "Bioshock 2." I loved the original. It was one of the greatest, most original and atmospheric games ever released. It may have been the spiritual successor of the equally amazing "System Shock" series, but it was entirely its own thing. As for its sequel, well... I liked Neil Marshall's horror flick "Descent" too, but that didn't mean they should have made "Descent Part II," a pointless, unoriginal retread that had very little new to offer, and what was new wasn't very good and reflected negatively on the original. I feel exactly the same way about "Bioshock 2."
I never saw the need for a sequel to begin with, in all honesty, as the first "Bioshock" wrapped itself up quite well. Now, "Bioshock Infinite" is in the works, almost acknowledging that a straight "Bioshock" sequel was always a bad idea in much the same way as the "Prince of Persia" franchise decided to go back to what worked with "The Forgotten Sands" after that next-gen reboot that might as well have played itself. Granted, "Infinite" is trading an underwater city for a flying city (very imaginative), but it's DIFFERENT. It has the potential to do what "Bioshock" did the first time around -- take what we love about that game but make it fresh again. Basically, everything that, I feel, "Bioshock 2" failed to do.
In "Bioshock 2," you get to play as a Big Daddy out to rescue his abducted Little Sister, and that's about as far as the game goes toward forging its own identity. You still tool around in Rapture, which looks almost exactly the same as it did when you last left it. You still scavange everything you can find while squaring off with those Adam-addicted freaks. The gameplay is identical in almost every way, but with one difference -- we've already done this, and there's no compelling reason to do it again when you could just as easily pop your far superior copy of the original "Bioshock" in and give it another playthrough. Even the game's most tauted feature, playing as a Big Daddy, is weakly executed. You feel every bit as fragile as you did in the first game, and aside from your armored hands filling the screen, it's hard to tell you're not the same protagonist from game one except for the fact that you can now march around with a Little Sister riding on your shoulder and directing you toward the next source of Adam.
I think critics put on the kiddie gloves when this game stepped into the ring earlier this year. My admiration for the first "Bioshock" doesn't cloud my judgment though when it concerns the sequel -- in fact, quite the opposite. The overwhelming feeling of sameness just kept creeping in on me during my time with "Bioshock 2," like I'd done all of this before only better. The first game's story was far superior on top of it -- especially the "Would you kindly?" revelation near the end, perhaps gaming's best ever "Gotcha!" moment. There are no such moments here, although the chance to see things from an entirely different and very eerie perspective near the game's conclusion is certainly the best moment in "Bioshock 2." But it can't hold a candle to learning the truth about your supposed benefactor in the original game.
And that's the problem. There's just not enough that's new here, and what is new just can't compete with what came before. Even the whole playing as a Big Daddy angle, were it executed better, still wouldn't be all that fresh since something similar essentially happens at the end of the first game. Basically, there are two camps of people who "Bioshock 2" is for -- those who missed the first one (Why?!), and those who played the first one several times and still can't get their fill of Rapture. On those grounds, this glorified expansion pack is certainly worth its weight in gold. But if you loved the first game, and let's face it you probably did, but expected much more out of a proper sequel, you'll probably be just as disappointed by this return to Rapture as I was. This makes it a hard game for me to actually score, but let me put it this way -- I was playing this and "Metro 2033" at around the same time, and constantly found myself being wooed away to the mutant-haunted tunnels of Moscow and turning my back on the undersea mess that was Andrew Ryan's supposed utopia...
Final Score: 6.9 (Fair)
I never saw the need for a sequel to begin with, in all honesty, as the first "Bioshock" wrapped itself up quite well. Now, "Bioshock Infinite" is in the works, almost acknowledging that a straight "Bioshock" sequel was always a bad idea in much the same way as the "Prince of Persia" franchise decided to go back to what worked with "The Forgotten Sands" after that next-gen reboot that might as well have played itself. Granted, "Infinite" is trading an underwater city for a flying city (very imaginative), but it's DIFFERENT. It has the potential to do what "Bioshock" did the first time around -- take what we love about that game but make it fresh again. Basically, everything that, I feel, "Bioshock 2" failed to do.
In "Bioshock 2," you get to play as a Big Daddy out to rescue his abducted Little Sister, and that's about as far as the game goes toward forging its own identity. You still tool around in Rapture, which looks almost exactly the same as it did when you last left it. You still scavange everything you can find while squaring off with those Adam-addicted freaks. The gameplay is identical in almost every way, but with one difference -- we've already done this, and there's no compelling reason to do it again when you could just as easily pop your far superior copy of the original "Bioshock" in and give it another playthrough. Even the game's most tauted feature, playing as a Big Daddy, is weakly executed. You feel every bit as fragile as you did in the first game, and aside from your armored hands filling the screen, it's hard to tell you're not the same protagonist from game one except for the fact that you can now march around with a Little Sister riding on your shoulder and directing you toward the next source of Adam.
I think critics put on the kiddie gloves when this game stepped into the ring earlier this year. My admiration for the first "Bioshock" doesn't cloud my judgment though when it concerns the sequel -- in fact, quite the opposite. The overwhelming feeling of sameness just kept creeping in on me during my time with "Bioshock 2," like I'd done all of this before only better. The first game's story was far superior on top of it -- especially the "Would you kindly?" revelation near the end, perhaps gaming's best ever "Gotcha!" moment. There are no such moments here, although the chance to see things from an entirely different and very eerie perspective near the game's conclusion is certainly the best moment in "Bioshock 2." But it can't hold a candle to learning the truth about your supposed benefactor in the original game.
And that's the problem. There's just not enough that's new here, and what is new just can't compete with what came before. Even the whole playing as a Big Daddy angle, were it executed better, still wouldn't be all that fresh since something similar essentially happens at the end of the first game. Basically, there are two camps of people who "Bioshock 2" is for -- those who missed the first one (Why?!), and those who played the first one several times and still can't get their fill of Rapture. On those grounds, this glorified expansion pack is certainly worth its weight in gold. But if you loved the first game, and let's face it you probably did, but expected much more out of a proper sequel, you'll probably be just as disappointed by this return to Rapture as I was. This makes it a hard game for me to actually score, but let me put it this way -- I was playing this and "Metro 2033" at around the same time, and constantly found myself being wooed away to the mutant-haunted tunnels of Moscow and turning my back on the undersea mess that was Andrew Ryan's supposed utopia...
Final Score: 6.9 (Fair)
"Metro 2033" Review (Xbox 360)
I hate that I'm so late in reviewing this game, which I purchased and completed months ago. But I would be remiss if I didn't put my opinion out there to whoever listens to some amateur video game reviewer like me in the first place. Bottom line: in my opinion, "Metro 2033" is easily one of the best games I've played in 2010. As much as I expected to love "Bioshock 2," that's how much I hadn't even heard of "Metro 2033" until its release. And, when it's all said and done, "Metro" filled the void that, in my opinion, "Bioshock 2" so thoroughly didn't manage to. This game, like the aforementioned original "Bioshock," presented a unique setting, an interesting story, creepy atmosphere, and rock solid gameplay. I found myself playing "Metro" instead of "Bioshock 2" at every opportunity. This wasn't a retread and an unnecessary sequel -- this was fresh.
You fill the post-Armageddon shoes of a young Russian survivor named Artyom living beneath Moscow in its network of tunnels. These tunnels house what's left of humanity as nuclear winter and mutant beings reign aboveground, connecting small communities of survivors known as "stations." In this dark, gritty environment, your job is to scout beyond the safety of these stations and unravel a new and sinister threat that is rearing its head.
In this game, atmosphere is King. The graphics engine may be a bit clunky, but it is more than apologized for by the unique setting, moody lighting, and excellent design. The oppressive darkness belowground is a character in and of itself, as is the feeling of isolation and claustrophobia. The weight of these sensations that the game creates is intentional and highly effective. Even when you do finally make your way to the surface and visit what's left of Moscow, these feelings remain, and in fact add urgency because you will be confined to your gas mask -- unless you want to die of radiation poisoning, that is. And to make matters worse, you will need to replace your gas mask and/or filter regularly, as each one will be spent in a matter of minutes. The sound of Artyom's gasps for air tell you in no uncertain terms how close you are to losing your final reserves of oxygen, and add a frantic quality to these outdoor segments that few games ever offer. Another nice touch that you will nonetheless not appreciate at all in your attemps to survive the game's dangers is the fact that enemy attacks can even leave marks in your mask that make visibility more difficult. Some players may find these kinds of things annoying -- but I embraced them in the spirit that the game intended.
"Metro" wants to play with your nerves. It wants to unsettle you. It wants to rattle you. And it wants to scare you. And if I drew up a list of the Top 10 Scariest Video Games of All Time According to Me, "2033" would be near the top of it. The mutant creatures in this game are truly inspired. They look fearsome, and they attack suddenly, lunging out of the darkness when they don't offer you the courtesy of a distant, terrifying howl that is sure to set your nerves on edge. One breed of ape-like mutant late in the game is particularly memorable, as they are somewhat passive so long as you are making direct eye contact with them -- but if you turn your back, they will be all over you like stink on a monkey. These are some of the most memorable beasts ever seen in a game. Human foes crop up on occassion, but are thankfully rare as they aren't very much fun to contend with and come complete with some truly clunky A.I.. If this game weren't built around its mutant creatures, to be honest, it wouldn't make for a very effective actioner. At all. But thankfully it knows its strengths and plays to them 90% of the time.
Speaking of the game's FPS elements, shooting the game's enemies isn't really fun, it's a relief. You're just glad you killed that mutant before it killed you. The weapons aren't especially memorable, and the shooting mechanics are a bit clunky -- but this game is really not about that. It's about exploring a world that is unique and immersive, and occassionally pulling the trigger just to stay alive. This is why the game's segments featuring human foes fare as poorly as they do.
The game promotes such feelings of isolation amidst the dark that the few times you join up with a human comrade, you feel genuine relief. Friendlies between stations are an exception to the rule, and they are only so helpful in watching your back, but you welcome them nonetheless. You will also take to scavaging quite quickly, much like in the aforementioned "Bioshock" games. Everything you come across lying in the tunnels or in the desolate streets of Moscow, you will probably if not certainly need. All those corpses lying around may be ominous, but it's always nice when you can rob one for some useful items or much-needed ammo.
The game offers two endings, but neither is as satisfying as it should be. The storyline kind of ambles and stumbles around late in the game too, which is disappointing since it's been so interesting up until this point. That and the game's at-times clunky shooting mechanics might put off some, as well as those Russian accents (too many characters sound EXACTLY the same as others you've met before), but rest assured, if you want to play an eerie, tense, and downright scary ass game, "Metro 2033" is about as good as it gets.
Final Score: 9.0 (Greatness)
You fill the post-Armageddon shoes of a young Russian survivor named Artyom living beneath Moscow in its network of tunnels. These tunnels house what's left of humanity as nuclear winter and mutant beings reign aboveground, connecting small communities of survivors known as "stations." In this dark, gritty environment, your job is to scout beyond the safety of these stations and unravel a new and sinister threat that is rearing its head.
In this game, atmosphere is King. The graphics engine may be a bit clunky, but it is more than apologized for by the unique setting, moody lighting, and excellent design. The oppressive darkness belowground is a character in and of itself, as is the feeling of isolation and claustrophobia. The weight of these sensations that the game creates is intentional and highly effective. Even when you do finally make your way to the surface and visit what's left of Moscow, these feelings remain, and in fact add urgency because you will be confined to your gas mask -- unless you want to die of radiation poisoning, that is. And to make matters worse, you will need to replace your gas mask and/or filter regularly, as each one will be spent in a matter of minutes. The sound of Artyom's gasps for air tell you in no uncertain terms how close you are to losing your final reserves of oxygen, and add a frantic quality to these outdoor segments that few games ever offer. Another nice touch that you will nonetheless not appreciate at all in your attemps to survive the game's dangers is the fact that enemy attacks can even leave marks in your mask that make visibility more difficult. Some players may find these kinds of things annoying -- but I embraced them in the spirit that the game intended.
"Metro" wants to play with your nerves. It wants to unsettle you. It wants to rattle you. And it wants to scare you. And if I drew up a list of the Top 10 Scariest Video Games of All Time According to Me, "2033" would be near the top of it. The mutant creatures in this game are truly inspired. They look fearsome, and they attack suddenly, lunging out of the darkness when they don't offer you the courtesy of a distant, terrifying howl that is sure to set your nerves on edge. One breed of ape-like mutant late in the game is particularly memorable, as they are somewhat passive so long as you are making direct eye contact with them -- but if you turn your back, they will be all over you like stink on a monkey. These are some of the most memorable beasts ever seen in a game. Human foes crop up on occassion, but are thankfully rare as they aren't very much fun to contend with and come complete with some truly clunky A.I.. If this game weren't built around its mutant creatures, to be honest, it wouldn't make for a very effective actioner. At all. But thankfully it knows its strengths and plays to them 90% of the time.
Speaking of the game's FPS elements, shooting the game's enemies isn't really fun, it's a relief. You're just glad you killed that mutant before it killed you. The weapons aren't especially memorable, and the shooting mechanics are a bit clunky -- but this game is really not about that. It's about exploring a world that is unique and immersive, and occassionally pulling the trigger just to stay alive. This is why the game's segments featuring human foes fare as poorly as they do.
The game promotes such feelings of isolation amidst the dark that the few times you join up with a human comrade, you feel genuine relief. Friendlies between stations are an exception to the rule, and they are only so helpful in watching your back, but you welcome them nonetheless. You will also take to scavaging quite quickly, much like in the aforementioned "Bioshock" games. Everything you come across lying in the tunnels or in the desolate streets of Moscow, you will probably if not certainly need. All those corpses lying around may be ominous, but it's always nice when you can rob one for some useful items or much-needed ammo.
The game offers two endings, but neither is as satisfying as it should be. The storyline kind of ambles and stumbles around late in the game too, which is disappointing since it's been so interesting up until this point. That and the game's at-times clunky shooting mechanics might put off some, as well as those Russian accents (too many characters sound EXACTLY the same as others you've met before), but rest assured, if you want to play an eerie, tense, and downright scary ass game, "Metro 2033" is about as good as it gets.
Final Score: 9.0 (Greatness)
In Retro: "Dead Rising" (Xbox 360)
Just in time for the sequel, I would like to make a confession to all you gaming priests out there. I don't like the original "Dead Rising." I'm weird like this, because I have often defended games that some would argue weren't worth defending -- "Damnation" springs to mind. And yet I've never met anyone who would dare say that Capcom's attempt at George Romero, complete with a mall setting, was, in fact, a bad game. And you know, maybe calling it a "bad game" is me being overly critical in an attempt to offer a contrary opinion when much of the gaming press leapt on the "'Dead Rising' is great" bandwagon. But I have to go with my gut, and my gut is quite blunt about one thing -- I just don't like this game.
The opening sequence starts off with a bang as you, or rather you in the guise of freelance photographer Frank West, snap photos of the carnage that is taking place beneath your chopper as you fly over a zombie-infected Colorado town. The beginning is unique, immersive, and even a little chilling. You can't help but feel a little grimy as you snap shots of zombies trying to invade a school bus without trying to lend a hand and possibly save the kids inside. A doomed woman on a rooftop even gestures your way in much-deserved disgust as zombies swarm around her, eventually causing her to plunge to her doom. As far as intros go, it's killer.
In my opinion, it's all downhill from there. From the crap storyline with its goofy characters on down to the ticking clock that ultimately ruins the entire experience for me, I just don't share the opinions of so many that this game is actually, well, good. I'm a rabid zombie fan and love George Romero's original trilogy of films, and the mall setting really captures the mood and feel of the original "Dawn of the Dead," so believe me when I say I truly wanted to like this game. So much so that I actually purchased it twice, the second time to give it another chance at winning me over. But no dice.
The worst part about it is, were it not for the save system and the real-time countdown, there's a hell of a promising zombie-slaying sandbox in here somewhere. The fact that you can make dead the undead in so many gory, ridiculous, and over-the-top ways is great (and again pays homage to the biker gang's gleeful zombie slayings in "Dawn"). But the sense of urgency you feel is not a good thing in this case. You can't just cut loose and play around with the threat of the game's end looming when time runs out, and this kills the sense of fun that game tries so hard to create. Why bash those walking corpses to death with a shopping cart when I should run past them and get to my destination as soon as humanly possible? This damn game makes me feel like that frickin' bunny in "Alice in Wonderland." Although, the one good thing about time running out for Frank West is that he's a dispicable protagonist, and he deserves to die in that mall.
I also loathe the game's brain-dead escort missions and, in particular, its human boss battles. How can it be easier to kill the undead than it is to kill one human being? Realism is not normally a concern of mine in gaming, but this just nags at me. These living bullet sponges take the focus away from where it belongs -- killing zombies. And killing zombies is already thwarted somewhat by that damn countdown and limited save function.
So yes, I admit it. I don't like "Dead Rising." I truly hope that "Dead Rising 2" addresses my problems with the first game, because I would love another badass zombie game this side of the unbelievably awesome "Left 4 Dead" series, and even the first one offers hints of what the game could be... But time will tell if it's more of the same, or a refinement on what should have been the first time around.
As a friend of mine and fellow hardcore gamer is known to say, I end this retrospective quoting him... "Fuckin' Capcom."
Final Score: N/A
The opening sequence starts off with a bang as you, or rather you in the guise of freelance photographer Frank West, snap photos of the carnage that is taking place beneath your chopper as you fly over a zombie-infected Colorado town. The beginning is unique, immersive, and even a little chilling. You can't help but feel a little grimy as you snap shots of zombies trying to invade a school bus without trying to lend a hand and possibly save the kids inside. A doomed woman on a rooftop even gestures your way in much-deserved disgust as zombies swarm around her, eventually causing her to plunge to her doom. As far as intros go, it's killer.
In my opinion, it's all downhill from there. From the crap storyline with its goofy characters on down to the ticking clock that ultimately ruins the entire experience for me, I just don't share the opinions of so many that this game is actually, well, good. I'm a rabid zombie fan and love George Romero's original trilogy of films, and the mall setting really captures the mood and feel of the original "Dawn of the Dead," so believe me when I say I truly wanted to like this game. So much so that I actually purchased it twice, the second time to give it another chance at winning me over. But no dice.
The worst part about it is, were it not for the save system and the real-time countdown, there's a hell of a promising zombie-slaying sandbox in here somewhere. The fact that you can make dead the undead in so many gory, ridiculous, and over-the-top ways is great (and again pays homage to the biker gang's gleeful zombie slayings in "Dawn"). But the sense of urgency you feel is not a good thing in this case. You can't just cut loose and play around with the threat of the game's end looming when time runs out, and this kills the sense of fun that game tries so hard to create. Why bash those walking corpses to death with a shopping cart when I should run past them and get to my destination as soon as humanly possible? This damn game makes me feel like that frickin' bunny in "Alice in Wonderland." Although, the one good thing about time running out for Frank West is that he's a dispicable protagonist, and he deserves to die in that mall.
I also loathe the game's brain-dead escort missions and, in particular, its human boss battles. How can it be easier to kill the undead than it is to kill one human being? Realism is not normally a concern of mine in gaming, but this just nags at me. These living bullet sponges take the focus away from where it belongs -- killing zombies. And killing zombies is already thwarted somewhat by that damn countdown and limited save function.
So yes, I admit it. I don't like "Dead Rising." I truly hope that "Dead Rising 2" addresses my problems with the first game, because I would love another badass zombie game this side of the unbelievably awesome "Left 4 Dead" series, and even the first one offers hints of what the game could be... But time will tell if it's more of the same, or a refinement on what should have been the first time around.
As a friend of mine and fellow hardcore gamer is known to say, I end this retrospective quoting him... "Fuckin' Capcom."
Final Score: N/A
"Wet" Review (PS3)
"Wet" is undoubtedly like some guy you knew in high school who tried so hard to be cool he just came across like a dumb ass. This game is nowhere near as "awesome" as it thinks it is, let's just get that out of the way. Everything from its grindhouse-style presentation (which really just serves to thinly mask its outdated graphics) to its soundtrack (sometimes enjoyable but mostly grating) reeks of its devs just trying WAY. TOO. HARD. Still, as for the gameplay itself... Not half bad. Repetitive? Sure. But pretty enjoyable in short bursts.
You take on the role of Rubi Malone, some kind of sword-wielding slash gunslinging bounty hunter who drops as many F-bombs as she can in a desperate attempt to impress you with her badass-ness. Though the game wants you to know that actress Eliza Dushku is voicing its protag, I would personally much rather be LOOKING at the real thing than listening, if you follow me. Besides, it's not like the character ever has anything even remotely interesting to say in a storyline that involves, eventually, being betrayed by one of her employers and setting out on a quest of vengeance. The plot is stylized, yes, but takes too long to get to the point and is ultimately forgettable.
But this is an action game. Is it fun? Yes. Rubi's acrobatic abilities and tight control make her come across like the love child of video game legends Lara Croft and Max Payne -- with a dab of The Bride from "Kill Bill" just to add some flavor. She leaps and bounds, slowing down the world around her as her enemies fall in bloody displays. Guns akimbo, it's cool that when Rubi dives in slo-mo, one of her weapons auto-targets while you the player take control of the other's aim. And slashing your foes to bits with a sword is pretty satisfying too, a welcome melee relief amidst so many bullets. Complete with upgradable abilities, there's a solid action game to be found here.
Too bad that apart from its annoying personality, the game looks pretty bad. All the visual filters in the world can't hide the fact that there are actually games on the Wii that look better than this one does. On top of which, the game slows to a crawl whenever you enter a locked down area, where Rubi must race to destroy several enemy spawning doorways and kill every last foe in the area if she is to move on. In a game that features such cool setpieces as a freeway shootout and a crashing airplane, these segments, which occur throughout, come across as filler. And the game's decision to play (and re-play, again and again) tracks from various musicians instead of score here just makes it worse. Mandatory training sequences time you while you run an obstacle course at various points as well, further slowing what would otherwise be a breakneck pace. It's just frustrating.
All in all, though, "Wet" definitely lives up to its title (which is short for "wetwork," as in getting your hands bloody), and when it works, it works well. It's just too bad the game tries so hard to be cool, and walks when it should be sprinting. Recommended for arcade-minded action fans who can get past its attempts at stylized hipness... and find it a lower price. There's good stuff in here, but sometimes you have to dig through shit to find it.
Final Score: 6.9 (Fair)
You take on the role of Rubi Malone, some kind of sword-wielding slash gunslinging bounty hunter who drops as many F-bombs as she can in a desperate attempt to impress you with her badass-ness. Though the game wants you to know that actress Eliza Dushku is voicing its protag, I would personally much rather be LOOKING at the real thing than listening, if you follow me. Besides, it's not like the character ever has anything even remotely interesting to say in a storyline that involves, eventually, being betrayed by one of her employers and setting out on a quest of vengeance. The plot is stylized, yes, but takes too long to get to the point and is ultimately forgettable.
But this is an action game. Is it fun? Yes. Rubi's acrobatic abilities and tight control make her come across like the love child of video game legends Lara Croft and Max Payne -- with a dab of The Bride from "Kill Bill" just to add some flavor. She leaps and bounds, slowing down the world around her as her enemies fall in bloody displays. Guns akimbo, it's cool that when Rubi dives in slo-mo, one of her weapons auto-targets while you the player take control of the other's aim. And slashing your foes to bits with a sword is pretty satisfying too, a welcome melee relief amidst so many bullets. Complete with upgradable abilities, there's a solid action game to be found here.
Too bad that apart from its annoying personality, the game looks pretty bad. All the visual filters in the world can't hide the fact that there are actually games on the Wii that look better than this one does. On top of which, the game slows to a crawl whenever you enter a locked down area, where Rubi must race to destroy several enemy spawning doorways and kill every last foe in the area if she is to move on. In a game that features such cool setpieces as a freeway shootout and a crashing airplane, these segments, which occur throughout, come across as filler. And the game's decision to play (and re-play, again and again) tracks from various musicians instead of score here just makes it worse. Mandatory training sequences time you while you run an obstacle course at various points as well, further slowing what would otherwise be a breakneck pace. It's just frustrating.
All in all, though, "Wet" definitely lives up to its title (which is short for "wetwork," as in getting your hands bloody), and when it works, it works well. It's just too bad the game tries so hard to be cool, and walks when it should be sprinting. Recommended for arcade-minded action fans who can get past its attempts at stylized hipness... and find it a lower price. There's good stuff in here, but sometimes you have to dig through shit to find it.
Final Score: 6.9 (Fair)
"Wolfenstein" 2009 Review (PS3)
The 2009 redux and/or sequel, confusingly named just "Wolfenstein" despite the fact that Castle Wolfenstein plays absolutely no role in the story and it's not really a remake of the first game, is nonetheless a triumphant return to the world of Nazi occultism and the exploits of B.J. Blazkowicz (best character name EVER!), and, I feel, one of last year's most underrated shooters despite a few admittedly hard to overlook issues.
The game lacks in storytelling, there's no doubt about that. You're B.J., and you're assigned by your superiors to infiltrate a European town during the second World War to find out just what evil the Nazis are up to now... and put a stop to it. The series has never been known for its storytelling chops (despite "Return to Castle Wolfenstein," was had a decent backdrop with its undead Vikings and such), so this isn't really a problem despite the fact that the game merely seems to end with little to no fanfare. By the time I had reached the finale, I had no idea that I was fighting the final boss battle, let alone that when the boss was defeated the credits would just sort of... well, roll. This kind of thing always bugs me. Last impressions count too, game devs! Still, it's the gameplay that counts, and this is where "Wolfenstein" shines.
Unlike past entries in the series, "Wolfenstein" offers a hub-based world for you to explore that is not entirely linear. There are optional missions to undertake, and if you feel like simply roaming about town shooting Nazis whenever you find them or looking for treasure, you can certainly do so. But although some story missions can be completed in the order you choose, most of the time they can't be. Still, all of this helps immerse you in the game's setting, and were it not for the annoyance of backtracking when you'd rather be busting caps in a Nazi's face "Inglorious Basterds" style, or the fact that transitioning between areas comes with a load time that's just long enough to make you impatient, this system works quite well, and gives the game a different feel than most other current shooters.
When you're not exploring the game's world, you're shooting Nazis... and undead Nazis... and mutant Nazis... and Nazi experiments gone terribly wrong. All to be expected in a game called "Wolfenstein." (It's just a pity there's no Mecha-Hitler to throw down against!) And shooting Nazis in this game is just plain fun. An arsenal of upgradable weapons that is probably the most satisfying and diverse in years and enemies that generally react believably to being shot by them make this game's action a cut above. Even early in the game the combat is brutal and satisfying, but near the end, when you've buffed your tools of destruction, it's just badass. Blowing an unsuspecting Nazi's head clean off with a sniper rifle never, and I mean NEVER, gets old.
B.J. is also armed with some occult abilities this time around, allowing him to enter a parallel realm called The Veil and summon its powers to battle his German adversaries. There are some cool and very useful options here, like being able to slow down time or create a shield around you that prevents bullets from ruining B.J.'s brand new leather jacket. The Veil ties in to the storyline as well this time around, as it represents the Nazis' convoluted attempt at world domination in some way or another that I never really bothered to understand.
The game's environments are immersive and believable, as well as graphically pleasing, while character models are less so but still look good. But the game's greatest strength is an arsenal of satisfying, upgradable weapons, some cool Veil powers, and a satisfying array of enemies to use them against. Some of the game should feel more... well, epic than it does (think "Call of Duty" or "Medal of Honor"), but this really is some of the finest FPS action out there. I just wish this great gameplay merged with a satisfying conclusion and didn't force me to backtrack so much, because these issues are really all that stand between "Wolfenstein" 2009 and me calling it a modern classic. As it is, though, I recommend this game to any FPS fan, provided they are patient enough for the game's quite deliberate pacing.
Before I end this review, however, I would just like to point out the title of this game yet again and state for the record that, well, I frickin' hate it. They would literally have been better off calling this game "Wolfenstein '09" than just calling it "Wolfenstein," which, during a conversation, can be pretty confusing. Am I talking about the first game that sparked off the FPS genre, or the 2009 sequel? It's like that rogue "Prince of Persia" game from a couple of years ago. Give it a damn subtitle like the earlier three games to avoid confusion! Or, better yet, don't talk about that addition to the franchise to start with, as it would have been just plain forgettable in my opinion had it not been so entirely disappointing. Thank God for "The Forgotten Sands" for going back to what worked. But anyway, I digress...
Final Score: 8.5 (Exceptional)
The game lacks in storytelling, there's no doubt about that. You're B.J., and you're assigned by your superiors to infiltrate a European town during the second World War to find out just what evil the Nazis are up to now... and put a stop to it. The series has never been known for its storytelling chops (despite "Return to Castle Wolfenstein," was had a decent backdrop with its undead Vikings and such), so this isn't really a problem despite the fact that the game merely seems to end with little to no fanfare. By the time I had reached the finale, I had no idea that I was fighting the final boss battle, let alone that when the boss was defeated the credits would just sort of... well, roll. This kind of thing always bugs me. Last impressions count too, game devs! Still, it's the gameplay that counts, and this is where "Wolfenstein" shines.
Unlike past entries in the series, "Wolfenstein" offers a hub-based world for you to explore that is not entirely linear. There are optional missions to undertake, and if you feel like simply roaming about town shooting Nazis whenever you find them or looking for treasure, you can certainly do so. But although some story missions can be completed in the order you choose, most of the time they can't be. Still, all of this helps immerse you in the game's setting, and were it not for the annoyance of backtracking when you'd rather be busting caps in a Nazi's face "Inglorious Basterds" style, or the fact that transitioning between areas comes with a load time that's just long enough to make you impatient, this system works quite well, and gives the game a different feel than most other current shooters.
When you're not exploring the game's world, you're shooting Nazis... and undead Nazis... and mutant Nazis... and Nazi experiments gone terribly wrong. All to be expected in a game called "Wolfenstein." (It's just a pity there's no Mecha-Hitler to throw down against!) And shooting Nazis in this game is just plain fun. An arsenal of upgradable weapons that is probably the most satisfying and diverse in years and enemies that generally react believably to being shot by them make this game's action a cut above. Even early in the game the combat is brutal and satisfying, but near the end, when you've buffed your tools of destruction, it's just badass. Blowing an unsuspecting Nazi's head clean off with a sniper rifle never, and I mean NEVER, gets old.
B.J. is also armed with some occult abilities this time around, allowing him to enter a parallel realm called The Veil and summon its powers to battle his German adversaries. There are some cool and very useful options here, like being able to slow down time or create a shield around you that prevents bullets from ruining B.J.'s brand new leather jacket. The Veil ties in to the storyline as well this time around, as it represents the Nazis' convoluted attempt at world domination in some way or another that I never really bothered to understand.
The game's environments are immersive and believable, as well as graphically pleasing, while character models are less so but still look good. But the game's greatest strength is an arsenal of satisfying, upgradable weapons, some cool Veil powers, and a satisfying array of enemies to use them against. Some of the game should feel more... well, epic than it does (think "Call of Duty" or "Medal of Honor"), but this really is some of the finest FPS action out there. I just wish this great gameplay merged with a satisfying conclusion and didn't force me to backtrack so much, because these issues are really all that stand between "Wolfenstein" 2009 and me calling it a modern classic. As it is, though, I recommend this game to any FPS fan, provided they are patient enough for the game's quite deliberate pacing.
Before I end this review, however, I would just like to point out the title of this game yet again and state for the record that, well, I frickin' hate it. They would literally have been better off calling this game "Wolfenstein '09" than just calling it "Wolfenstein," which, during a conversation, can be pretty confusing. Am I talking about the first game that sparked off the FPS genre, or the 2009 sequel? It's like that rogue "Prince of Persia" game from a couple of years ago. Give it a damn subtitle like the earlier three games to avoid confusion! Or, better yet, don't talk about that addition to the franchise to start with, as it would have been just plain forgettable in my opinion had it not been so entirely disappointing. Thank God for "The Forgotten Sands" for going back to what worked. But anyway, I digress...
Final Score: 8.5 (Exceptional)
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